I never do

"I don't get you... with her" I say shaking my head. "I really don't"

"I know you don't. You're not the first person to say that."

There is silence. I look down at the table. The bar is crowded, there is music but it's muffled because it's coming from inside the bar and we're seated on the outside. So all we hear is mixed conversations from the other tall tables around us. He gets a faraway look in his eyes, absently picks his mug of beer and gulps down a fair bit. The yellow liquid swirls around in the mug as he lays it down again.

"The thing is I can imagine my life without a lot of people in it. But I can't imagine my life without her."

He looks at me then. A quick glance probably to see how I would react to this revelation.

"That's probably the most profound thing you've ever said to me about your relationship with her. Why didn't you ever tell me this before?"

"I don't know. I think I just realised it myself" he says.

I just sip my beer and don't reply.

"But honestly, most of the time it feels like we're brother and sister " he adds.

I shake my head again. "Yes, that I've heard before"

"Sometimes though..."

He pauses. Takes another swig out of his mug.

"Sometimes what?" I ask.

"Sometimes I just want to grab her, push her against the wall and take her right there" he says looking at me again.

"But then..." he continues "I never do".